Going Back to Work

It's my first day back to work tomorrow. I am looking forward to getting back into my groove, but distraught about leaving my baby. I knew this time would come, but I'm still not prepared! There are so many mixed emotions swirling in my head. Mostly my heart is just aching at the thought of someone else getting to see my baby's "firsts." I know that every working mother goes through this, but unfortunately knowing I am not alone doesn't console me much. I try desperately to take comfort in the fact that a wonderful lady is keeping her and that she is just around the corner from me, but it still hurts. I am her mom and I should be the one cuddling her and teaching her new things all day. I worry that she will miss the sound of her mommy's voice or somehow feel like I have abandoned her for the day. I know this isn't the case because a 2 1/2 month old can't rationalize what is happening, but it doesn't change the fact that I can. I know that many tears will be shed tomorrow, just the way they are streaming down my cheeks now. I can only hope that God will help me through this and make it a little easier each day.